Hey Gorgeous!!
So what exactly has been on my mind for the past few weeks... taking steps towards my dreams! Yet, I fear having a back up plan or alternate strategy can be keeping them in the box and locked away.
Do you know if you are sabotaging your dreams or not?
Let me explain a little more.
I have had 2 projects on my mind the past few months, other than all the other things that occupy my mind like work, learning to be a good mom to my 6-year old step son, being pregnant, publishing my books, getting somewhere with my writing to get paid for it and and and...
The first project on my mind is designing my own success journal for 2020. You see I haven't found one that 100% works for me and end up using a few different books to try and accomplish the same goal. The only thing is that it takes time - which I have very little of.
I love Mel Robbins 5 second journal for the organising side of things - if I could have bought a hard cover copy I would of (Grab it here). I love Linda's Abundance Journal which offers so much information and motivation, which is the diary I am currently using (check it out here). I love doing daily affirmations, sending my daily motivational quotes and lastly reviewing my day to see how productive I was (also partly inspired by Chris Haroun's daily planner - grab it here).
My problem is time.
Part of me has considered just buying Linda's new 2020 Abundance diary (which is gorgeous), but on the other hand it feels like I am admitting defeat and sabotaging that dream, even if it is postponing it for a little while.
The second project... even though maybe project isn't the correct word is finding a way to earn some income as a freelance writer or writer in general. The due date for my baby girl is slowly but also quickly approaching and the thought of only getting 3-4 months with her at home is heartbreaking. After working as a teacher in Thailand for 3.5 years, the thought of going back to a corporate job was terrifying and a little soul destroying, yet here I am in a corporate job, doing what I need to do to pay the bills and look after my family.
People suggest looking for a new job, but this also once again defeats the object. Part of it is about having faith in myself and my writing, which is scary! The digital age and market is filled with opportunities but also saturated in some markets. It's just the literal step of going from here (being an unpaid writer) to there (earning something, enough or more than enough) to support my family.
So many people have advice, thing is I can't afford these programs at the moment! When our focus is on saving, how can I be irresponsible like that. Plus all these programs are in US Dollars which might be cheap for better off countries, but in South Africa you have to time it by 15. So $49 is R723.00 sometimes a month!
It is at a time like this when I need to sit myself down and make a strategy list. If I focus on the long term goal only... that is overwhelming and scary. The best thing I can do is focus on the next step and take it from there. If all I have are my lunch breaks to take steps towards my dreams... then I best make them count.
I need to nip my procrastination habit in the butt, as that is just a fear habit which ever way you look at it. Over the past few weeks I have realised that I have all the skills and tools I need to make a success of myself, it literally just means I need to step up and make it happen.
If today taught me anything is I miss doing a job I thoroughly enjoy. I miss working with people who are actually happy and happy to see each other. I miss working for a reason that has purpose and helps change peoples lives.
Identifying your fears is the first step to overcoming them. Face them and remember life wasn't meant to be lived in fear, but it was meant to be lived with enthusiasm and passion.
This is me kicking fear out the door and admitting them to you! You are not alone and you are worthy of your dreams.
Have you been putting off your dreams? What small step can you take towards them?
If I had one wish for you, it's that you realise you are enough and you are worthy of living that life you dream of.
I'd love to hear from you... So do leave some comment love <3
Much Love
Chanzie
xxx
Great article, it's given me a bit of inspiration, you're absolutely right. I have all the tools I need to make a success of myself, but man... Where do I even begin? I have an idea of the goal, but I'm clueless on how to get there. Gonna take your advice and work on a strategy. Just gonna start at the first step and hope the rest will follow.
ReplyDeleteAll you need to figure out is the next small step :) So glad you gained a bit of inspiration from her <3 The rest will follow with a little bit of faith and courage. Please do let me know how it is going xx
DeleteI think everybody sabotages their own dreams (from the little ones to the big ones) all the time. Fear of failure is a major reason, procrastination is another big one. It's easy to never give up on your dreams but harder to admit that you are subconsciously working against ever achieving them.
ReplyDeleteI wish you lots of luck on achieving yours!
But I wouldn't worry too much about the planner... Make a choice and go with it. You're wasting brain space and energy by fretting over it so much. :)
I agree with you :) Thanks for the encouragement! I will get there. Lucky I am not too hard on myself and have the happy hopefulness to keep going xx
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