Soul Inspirations: Why backup plans suck!

Gooooood Morning Lovelies

Welcome back to my happy place, where I can be me, and you are free to be whoever it is you want to be too. 

So let's get straight to the point... 

Backup plans suck! 

Yes, you read correctly. 

To be honest, I used to be that girl that had a backup plan A, B and C. I am still that girl that needs a plan to feel like I have it all together, and am making some progress in my life, even if it is just to get up, make coffee and open a book of some sorts... Well, maybe not that simple, but close enough. I can only do 'nothing' for about 1 day before I get anxious, and my need to feel a bit productive. 

As a human I still like to have options, because this is just part of our nature. Having options helps us feel like we have control. Whether it be ordering food at a restaurant or deciding where to travel to next. 

Now maybe you are wondering... how did I go from that girl with those thoughts, to this statement? 

About a year or two ago, a close friend of mine, Phil, who has counselled me through quite a lot in my life, made this statement to me and I complete protested and disagreed. He told me that that "Back up plans are made to sabotage our main plan." 

It is like a failure fail safe. 

I argued and said, there was nothing wrong with being prepared! Saying OK.... I really really really want "X" but if I don't succeed for whatever reason, I will settle for "Y." And that my friend is the truth. We are what we repeatedly say and do 100%. 

Our words are magic. When you say those words, even in a jokingly way, you give them power. For example when you say, we will see if it works and if not we can always break up.

This is a mind-set with an escape plan. 

I had this in my previous relationship, and we broke up twice within a year. Until we stopped saying this, it was always a possibility of a reality. We then shifted our 'mind-set' from this is just an argument and we will work it out, (deleting the word breakup from our vocabulary), and we were very happy for another 5 years or so. Our insecurities of the other person leaving also disappeared. And this applies to every area of our life, whether it be work, diet, friends and so on. 

But that is not all that this post is about. Let me give you an example from my own life about how a backup plan became my main plan. 

When I worked at my last company in South Africa, a lot of things were changing. I had resigned and had made up my mind to go and study in the UK. This was what I had wanted at that point in my life 100%. My unsurety came through and I always jokingly said "Well if that doesn't work out, I can always go and be a teacher in Thailand." Yes... you got it... I have been a teacher in Thailand for 3 years now. It started out as a random opportunity and detour and somewhere along the way I fell completely in love with it. 

Time and time again, my back up plans have become my main plans, whether it be for something small on the weekend activity or big life changes like from UK to Thailand. 

Then Phil's words came rushing back to me, one sunny afternoon while I was probably riding on my bike somewhere, because for some reason I always get the best ideas or thoughts when I am nowhere near a pen, paper or computer. 

There is a time and a place for a backup plan, but when you are reaching for your dreams, this is not one of those places. Having a backup plan, can make you less committed to your goal, because you have a soft fluffy cushion to fall back on that you know will work, but this is not necessarily the thing that makes your heart flutter with joy and excitement. It means that you have accepted somewhere in your mind that you might fail. 


The people that have the best success stories and live fulfilled lives, are not the ones who went with the back up plans. They are the ones who stuck to their guns and stayed focused on what they truly wanted. 

This year I am throwing the backup plan out the window. I have faith in myself to deal with any obstacles as they come along and adjust my decisions accordingly as the time arises. It is scary, but it is the only way. So what if I am 32, unmarried, no kids and no massive achievements. I have gone places and seen things most people can only dream of, the way I see and dream of things that others have already conquered. Those that are more courageous and have climbed to the top of that mountain, traveled to more countries and just generally have their shit together. 

Are you brave enough to let go of the backup plan and fully commit to your goals and dreams?? 

Peace out 

Chanzie 
xxx 

Credit to: AZ Quotes for their awesome pictures

Free To Be You Soul Inspirations: Can a 1% action change your life?

Hello Superstars

Today I wanted to share my thoughts on New Years Resolutions. A quote that I think about all the time is: 

How many times do we complain that we are not getting results, yet we make no effort to change the way we do or see things. If we always do what we have always done, we will always have what we have always received. It is as simple as that. Sometimes we need to change our perspective or do things in reverse. My manager challenged me last year and said, how about when you walk into a lesson, do things in reverse. Instead of ending the lesson with a game, start it with a game, as an example. 

I remember reading somewhere that all it takes is a 1% change in your routine to make a difference to your life. 

1%... how small does that sound? Is that even worth it? What is that... like 1 action? 
And the answer is yes. 1 action. 1 change in your routine can make all the difference in the world. 

Take one of your dreams and decide how you are going to make it a reality. My biggest dream is to be a successfully published author. I know the type of writer I want to be. It is weird because my dream really falls into 2 difference genres. 

Writer number 1 

I want to be a motivational writer. I love to inspire people, to help them see their own light and capability. So, I want to write about life stuff... Like I am doing right now. There is honestly no better compliment for me than when someone reads a piece of my work and it resonates with them deeply, almost as if they could have written it themselves. It is that connection in the writing that someone somewhere else in the world understands exactly what you are going through or what you feel. That little moment and connection is the biggest reward in my opinion. I know what it is like to read a piece of writing and have it bring me to tears, when I was in a really low place, at those times I didn't feel so alone. 

This has happened to me a few times, but there are two times that really stand out for me. Firstly, when I read a book called "The Fairy Godmothers guide to getting what you want" by Donna McCallum (South Africa's very own fairgodmother). I was in bed reading on a Sunday night. My relationship was a mess, my job was boring, and my daily routine was mind numbingly boring. As I read Donna's words, I just started crying as I realised that things didn't have to be that way and I could change my life. As scary and overwhelming as that felt. The second time, was this year when I saw Instagram snippets from Daniel Chidiac's book "Who says you can't? You do." It hit home in so many ways. 

If I could be even half as good as them, I would feel like a success. Yet, I know it is the fear of failure that slows my progress. 

Writer number 2

I want to publish a paranormal romance novel. Sure, my dreams of being as great as Cassandra Clare, Lauren Kate and JK Rowling seem a bit 'out there', but it is what inspires me. If they can try and succeed, then why can't I? I know there are millions of novels in the world, and that there are millions of wonderful stories out there that don't even get half the credit they deserve, but I at least have to try. It would an injustice to myself if I didn't. 

A true story that inspires me is the one about JK Rowling. She was 31, a single mother, was unemployed and sitting on a train when she first started writing Harry Potter. She was rejected by 12 different publishers before someone gave her a chance. 

At the beginning of 2018 I decided to do a New Years Resolution with my students in class. Even though I have brushed off this trend for years and not bothered to even try set them, I gave it one more shot. While I was preparing for class I jotted down 10 habits I would like to implement in my life more frequently. They started out as just an example but the the more I did the class with each level, the more I realised that these were really things I wanted to change in my life. 

Chanzie's New Years Resolutions

1. Work out more 

To be healthy and fit, as well as feel my more confident in my own skin. I am so over trying to lose weight. I always look back and think... gosh I wasn't as fat as I thought I was. I actually looked good. You always want the things you had, and never what you have. So my first mindset was to love the skin I am in, and appreciate my healthy, fully functional body. 

2. Watch Motivational Videos

What you listen to and put in your mind plays a huge role in how you think. We are but the company we keep. So, I decided that instead of only listening to my music every morning I would search on Youtube for any motivational videos to listen to while I got ready for work. This has been my best and biggest change so far. It is my best 1% to date. 

3. Write more 

Write write write.. even if it's badly. Even if it's boring. Even if it's a little bit.. 100 words is better than nothing... This has been my motto lately.. I have been procrastinating I know... but... everyday is a new day, new week and new chance to start again. The book isn't going to write itself...

4. Read something 

Read a page of a book a day. That is how you increase your knowledge. That is how you grow and learn new things. I made a new rule.. in the effort to spend less time on social media, that every time I open Facebook, I need to go and read a page or a paragraph of a book. 

5. De-clutter

Clear out the old stuff on a regular basis. Whether it be papers or random rubbish I collect around my apartment. Clear my space physically, it helps clear my mind as well. I went on all my messenger applications and cleared most of my messages. Such a simple step yet so releasing at the same time, just letting go of all those emotional chords. 

6. Eat Well 

What you eat, affects your moods. Eating better leads to me feeling better. It's as simple as that. Yes, sometimes eating healthy can get a bit pricey, but it is always worth it in the end. I don't deny myself the good things in life, like dairy queen, but there is a time and place for everything. Look after your health now, so that it doesn't fail you when you need it later on. 

7. Affirmations

OK, so I haven't been that great with this one just yet, but with all the motivational videos I have been watching, the repeated thoughts I think and tell myself have become not so judgmental and definitely more encouraging. 

8. Save 

Don't squander your money but don't be a miser either. Where I can, I choose to maybe not get things that I just want. I want to save more, so that I can travel more. Travelling lights up my soul and frees my spirit. I have a monthly savings budget, a weekly challenge and then just a general mindfulness of where I invest my hard earned salary. 

9. Study

Practise a skill. The only way to master it is the put in the time and the effort. Right now I am between learning Spanish and doing a free online Social Media Marketing Course through Shaw academy. 

10. Meditate

Taking 10 minutes out of my day to just calm my mind and focus on the present does wonders. As a teacher my mind always runs a mile a minute and has about 100 tabs open like Google Chrome. 

***

I have a checklist stuck on my cupboard and as long as I do at least 3 of these 10 a day, I am happy. The most I have achieved in 1 day so far is 6 which is like a home run! 

Many times I think, maybe I shouldn't share that and maybe I shouldn't post that. Who cares about it anyway, but what keeps me sharing is that from time to time, people reach out and say "Thank you, I live through your eyes and after a bad day sometimes I get home and your post makes me feel OK or like I am not so alone." I try my best to be a good teacher. Sometimes I have bad lessons or a bad day, but that doesn't make me a failure at all. 

I would love to hear some of your 1% changes you have implemented and how they have helped you. Sharing is inspirational, we learn by others as much as we learn by ourselves. 

Peace and love 
Chanzie 
xxx

A New Space for My Thoughts

Hello Lovelies 

Welcome to my new blog! 

I have been thinking about this for a while and today I finally decided to create a new space for my thoughts. A place where I can post what I want, when I want, and as often or as little as I want . I do promise I will try and be as consistent as possible, in between managing my life as a teacher, writer, traveller, friend and well... human being. 

Some of you might have followed my old blog "Mean Who You Are" , which I disabled about a month ago, and wonder why I made this leap? 

Well, I felt like my old blog represented a closed chapter of my life. I have grown and changed so much since I started it. Even though I blogged my way through a lot of my travels and shared a very few of my worldly experiences since then, I wanted a new clean slate. 

So what exactly have I been up to?? 

I moved to Thailand and became an English Second Language Teacher, I moved back to South Africa for four months, only to realise I missed Thailand too much and decided to return to the land of smiles again.

• I back packed my way down from the North to the South of Thailand over 17 days and travelled to 7 different places in October last year.
• I made a few friends, lost a few friends, fell in love, broke some hearts and had my heart broken. 
• I got 3 tattoos
• Learnt to ride a motorcycle in Thailand
• Got a Thai motorcycle license 
• Am still learning to speak Thai 
• Restarted writing my book about my life 
• Started a new novel in NaNoWriMo 2017
• Dyed my hair Mahaogany, brown and back to blonde

These are just some of the things I can think of, right off the bat about what has changed since life re-routed and reset for me in 2014. I wish I could share more photos but I have taken too many over the past few 3 years. You are welcome to connect with me on Instagram (@chanzies) if you want another peak at my traveller life!! 

Anyway I just wanted to shout out and touch base with those who are still around. There are many blogging friends that I miss and hope to reconnect with over the next few weeks. 

Peace and Love 

Chanzie 

xxx